At this very moment I don't know if I have ever felt the way I do now. The past 1.5 months have had a lot of non-stop drama and before I can catch my breath another event occurs. Now, add all this up with the fact that my book will be rereleased in seven months and the end result is one very frazzled person.
How is this effecting me? My emotions are currently erratic and quick to snap. I usually am the least angry person I know, but recently small things have been infuriating me. Honestly, I have never once had any sort of anger towards other drivers on the public road, but the past week or so I have been getting visibly agitated towards other drivers. This has never happened before.
I feel, as each day goes by, as if the pressure and anxiety are increasing. There is so much to get done in regards to my book as well as the hope that I do a nationwide speaking tour next April. Those are huge plans, but nothing is for certain now.
What I am going through now is a clear example of how one issue can create issues on all fronts. Everytime in my life, when something has been weighing on me, I get the same results. The current era at the moment though is more acute than the others.
What's going to happen with this? I don't know, but I hope I can and somehow I hope I cane just forget what needs and could happen. I blogged about this sometime within the past three months and maybe in a few more I'll talk about it again. The bottomline is this isn't enjoyable but it is something that needs to happen. So, if you do talk to me in person, and I seem out of place or less responsive than I normally am, or perhaps I even get a bit snippy, it probably isn't you. With something like this on my mind I will be those things as I'm sure anyone would be to a degree. However, being on the spectrum compounds the matter so the pressure anyone would feel is amplified and again, I may be a bit snippy but it isn't you.