This morning I had a presentation at the break of dawn at a school Normally, if I do a presentation before 8AM it is awful, but something special happened today.
I was unprepared for this presentation. I thought it was just going to be to about 2-4 teachers but it turned out the entire school's teacher roster was there (65 teachers). The time slot was one-hour and I was going in without my PowerPoint.
A year ago this presentation would have been impossible for me; or in the least it would not have been any good. However, I am still growing as a presenter and I look forward to presentations without the PowerPoint because, since I have done it so much, I feel as if the audience will feel as if I am scripted because I know I've done it so much (that's the, "I think therefore you should know" thing getting in the way).
In yesterday's blog I mentioned how bad I felt at the banquet, but this morning I was able to harness those emotions I had for the good because I was able to instantly recall other instances I had in school that made me feel the same way.
I feel this morning's presentation was my best to date. The questions after my 45 minute freestyle presentation were awesome as well. I don't usually boast about comments as typically I find it hard to see the value in what I do as I see it this way, "What's special about it? It's just me talking." but after the severe awkwardness I experienced last weekend I wanted to once again express myself. This morning, in a way, felt like the first time I sat down to write in a way as I took a disorganized symphony of thoughts and feelings and made it into something that could be heard and understood.
When the hour was up I could tell that it was sort of a let down because I think they wanted more. There were many "thank you's" and, "I wish I would have heard you earlier." Of all the comments though the one that will stick with me, and this will stick forever, is one of the last ones as this man came up, shook my hand, and said, "Thank you. You have rekindled my passion in teaching." It was eight years ago this week that I got my diagnosis and I thought my life was over because of it. I was blind to the potential and often times I'm asked that, if I could would I choose not to be on the spectrum, and to that I always say "no." Today that no is louder than ever. I don't know how I do what I do on here and in presentations, but even I can't mistake the profoundness in that teacher's line. It was a long road to get to where I am now, but right this second I feel on top of the world and I wouldn't change one thing about my journey because it was all worth it.