Tuesday, June 28, 2022

The mistiming caused by processing

Conversations are much like a dance in my eyes. There are steps, movements, pauses, and from my vantage point it seems everyone has this ability to all hear the same rhythm while I’m trying to figure out the simple beat. One of the causes of this is the processing it takes to understand what has been said. 

At times, people take processing delays as a person being either slow or uninterested. Both are false as I’m actually too fast in processing as I’m calculating all the possible reasons what was said was said, all the possible responses I could give, and all the possible responses the person will have to my response. In other words, I’m trying to calculate the incalculable.

One of the impacts this has is that I can create a continuation of a conversation from hours, or maybe even days before. The other person may have moved on, or may not even remember the conversation the way I do and where it was left off. Furthermore, when I come up with what I need to say, it’s almost impossible to delay because it’s already been so long.

Our timing in conversations can be off, but it isn’t a case of being disinterested. I’m so interested in what was going on I’m willing to interrupt what you’re doing right now, and what you’re doing may be important, but when I finally have a response it just has to be said.

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